The Bigger Picture

Especially Fond

2010-07-06T20:19:00.005-05:00

One of my favorite books is The Shack by William P. Young. I did a scrapbook page today inspired by the phrase that "Papa" uses so often: "I'm especially fond of that one." Sophie, Emma, Owen--I'm especially fond of you.

Mom, can we go to the pool?

2010-06-26T20:33:00.010-05:00

Yep, she said. Again. :) And here they are.

Dear Tooth Fairy...

2010-06-22T07:56:00.004-05:00

"Mom, did you throw away that paper towel on the counter?" The question from Emma barely registered, but apparently the tooth she'd lost while I was having a rare nap with Owen was IN that paper towel, and when I went back into cleaning-up Mom mode, I threw it away. Here was our solution.

Translation Unnecessary

2010-06-10T07:39:00.008-05:00

The cutest thing happened the other day. Jeff and I were sitting in the bonus room when suddenly the sounds of "Hey Jude" came blaring out of Sophie's room--the "naaah, na na na-na-naa-naaaah" part. Next, we heard Owen's feet pounding down the hall, and he came bursting into the room and started "talking" to us so "clearly", gestures and all. His hands were out at his sides, his little palms were turned upward, shoulders hunched, and the expression on his face was priceless. If he had the words, he would have said, "I was in Sophie's room (I know I probably shouldn't have been) and I touched some button on that pink thing on her night stand, and some really loud music came on and it SCARED ME! Could you please come help me?" So Jeff followed him in there, they got the music turned off, and Jeff said he did the "talking" thing again when they went to shut the door to Sophie's room. This time it was clearly, "I left my car on the night stand and I want to get it." So they got the car, and then all was well. SUCH a cutie, this boy of ours.

Hello Summer

2010-06-05T07:58:00.001-05:00

I love to have a little more time in the summer for my favorite hobby-- scrapbooking. This is my first page of the summer.

Memorial Day: Memories, Musings, Meaning

2010-05-31T19:43:00.018-05:00

They handed me a small, red, paper poppy--three elderly gentlemen from the American Legion seated at a card table in the produce department at Kroger last night. One of them smiled at Emma and Owen, and said he had a granddaughter from China. I thanked him and walked on. I remembered the flood of emotions from singing “God Bless America” earlier in church, and how we had thanked the servicemen and women in our midst, and how I’d just been thinking of those red poppies that had been handed to me as a child when we’d walked the 2 blocks up to the Memorial Day parade in Alton, Illinois. It’s one of the oldest in the country, dating back to the beginning of the holiday back in 1868, but I didn’t know that then. I just knew that every year, it was something we wouldn’t miss. School was almost out, the rumble of the drums from the marching bands, cheers from the crowds, zooming of the little motorcycles the Shriners drove dangerously close to the crowds, the clop-clop of the horses’ hooves, and the revving of the engines of the all those cars from the Alton Antique Auto Club were so close to my house that there was no way they could pass by unnoticed. I remember standing there with my brother and my Aunt Alice one year as the veterans walked by. This was one of the less exciting parts for me as a child, of course—why so serious on such a fun day? And I remember Alice soberly commenting, “We can never do enough for them.” I will never forget those words, and I heard them coming from my own mouth as we walked through the produce section in Kroger last night and I tried to explain what Memorial Day is about to Emma and Owen.

The great thrill came for me as a child when I actually got to participate in that ancient parade. I remember decorating my bike in red, white, and blue, and riding in it one time. Then I had an official reason to march—I was a Brownie. I remember being advised by Alice not to wear a certain pair of brown and white oxfords with a chunky heel because they would be most uncomfortable, but did I listen? And then standing in Oakwood Cemetery, the end of the parade route, blessedly no longer marching, blisters blazing and knowing she was so right as I listened to Taps and the 21-gun salute. There were the years of marching with Mr. Wilcox and the East Jr. High School Band, and then the Alton High School Marching 100. Standing in the scorching heat some years in the parking lot at Alton High as we waited to get started, thanking the Lord I took up flute and not some heavier instrument. I remember playing “Yankee Doodle” over and over on the piccolo with my friends, and stuffing it up my sleeve to protect it when it began to drizzle.

I remember bringing Sophie to the parade in Alton several times, starting around the age of two—as soon as she was old enough to last through it. My dad would usually drive one of his old cars in the parade, and I wanted her to experience the same feelings I had when I was a child. I recall one time walking up Edwards Street and a car screeching to a halt, and my best childhood friend, Kitty, hopping out in tears to give me a hug. We had been in that parade together many times—as Brownies, fellow band members (I only played flute because she did!), and one time when she was the drum major. I found myself thinking about the parade this morning and wished I was there with my kids. Sophie would love to see the bands, being the trumpet player she is now, Emma would love all of it, and Owen would get a thrill out of all of the cars! Maybe next year.

When we came through customs both times bringing our youngest two Chinese-born children home, brand-spanking new American citizens upon the plane’s touchdown on U.S. soil, I felt sad that they didn’t get better welcomes. In Minneapolis when we brought home Emma, the best I can hope is that the grumpy document review guy was having a bad day, and in Chicago last summer, we met the most unhelpful people in our whole 27-hour trip home. Welcome to America, Owen. But kids, even with the struggles America faces today, you are still coming to the greatest country on earth, and this day is about remembering those who gave all to make, and keep it that way. Alice was so right…”We can never do enough for them.”

One more week and I'm done!

2010-05-16T21:15:00.002-05:00

I'm so happy that summer is almost here. I have one more week to go and I'll have one of my harder school years behind me. It's been hard for many reasons--new standards, not starting the year with my group because of being home with Owen after his surgery, adjusting to being a mom of three, struggling because I just wanted to BE with Owen...OK, that's enough right there.

I've missed blogging. I can't believe that the last post was on February 14th. I've become a "fast-food" sort of writer, preferring Facebook to my blog, and putting all my ideas down in short spurts. Yes, it's fun to interact, but I miss my blog friends, and I miss taking the time to think things through and express myself without having to worry about word count! It has been difficult to even sit at the computer with a little person wanting to push the buttons, so I will post a quick photo to FB on my iPhone, but I'm looking forward to not rushing around quite so much. Soon...but not yet. One more week.

A Message From Owen's Nannies

2010-02-14T19:20:00.006-06:00

On June 1st, 2009, we met our son Owen Li Trubey in the city of Changsha, Hunan Province, China at the Adoption Center. Before we left, Jeff asked his sweet nannies who had made the trip from the orphanage in Chenzhou to say a little something to him on the video tape. Owen's Chinese name is Chen Li Wen; his nickname was in the customary way--"Wen-Wen". This is what they said:

First Nanny: "Wen-Wen, I hope you will be happy every day." She said something else in a local dialect...my friend who translated wasn't able to make it out. There are many, many dialects of the Chinese language.

Second Nanny: "Wen-Wen, I hope you will be happy in the States. Bye."

I feel such gratitude to these ladies who made the trip with our boy to the city of Changsha. To know this sweet baby is to love him. How their hearts must have been pulling away, having to get ready to hand him over to us, hoping we'd be a good family...more than likely they knew Owen since he had arrived at the orphanage, a jaundiced newborn baby, with a cleft lip and palate, unable to take a bottle unless they cuddled him just so to allow gravity to get the liquid down...I can barely stand to think about it. And they described him in his referral as an "obedient and dear baby". I remember thinking as I read that, "How could they know?" But they were right. What perfect words to describe this little boy I've come to love so fiercely.

Ladies, he IS happy every day. This is his nature. He is surrounded by people who recognize what a special little boy he is. Thank you for giving him such a wonderful start.

Stealth-Car Boy Strikes Again...

2010-02-07T12:35:00.006-06:00

Owen has this charming habit of surprising me by leaving his calling card behind...a little car tucked in a drawer, etc. I find them in my coat pockets, my purse--everywhere. I sighed just a few minutes ago as I opened the dishwasher to put in another dirty fork for what seemed like the millionth time this weekend, and there it was...his little red car in the silverware basket. He had been "helping" me earlier. Sweet baby boy. How happy he makes me, even when I'm bone-tired.

Big Splash Adventure!

2010-01-19T13:13:00.002-06:00

Click here to view these pictures larger

Snow Days!!!

2010-01-08T14:43:00.008-06:00

It was only about an inch of snow, but they made the most of it. And bitter cold made sure that what fell stuck around for 2 days, and iced over the winding back roads so that we got out of school for two days. Owen got his first ride on a sled and got up off of it just thrilled. The video clip here is actually the second time down. If you listen closely you can hear his little happy sounds, and he turns around to run right back up and do it again. :)

It's only a matter of time...

2010-01-07T20:14:00.004-06:00

Jeff texts me from upstairs (yes, upstairs): "See if Emma wants to come up and play with Owen." Emma is thrilled she can read this message! She texts him back, "Hi Daddy!" I realize it will only be a matter of time before she's rattling off texts like Sophie. Thank heaven we have unlimited texting on our plan! Sophie announced to us the number of texts she sent last month (she's checked...it's a status symbol, I think), informed us that I sent the next highest number (thanks, Lisa!!!) and that Jeff was last. All I can say is that I'm glad Sophie and I don't have the same kind of phone any more or I would be going crazy. As it is, Jeff and I are saying to each other, "Is that you or me?" Technology. How did we live without it?

Owen, Elmo, and Andrea Bocelli

2010-01-05T20:18:00.004-06:00

Jeff happened upon this video of a couple of our favorite guys on YouTube...and Owen was enthralled. Take a look:

Hello blog, I've missed you...

2009-12-30T21:16:00.013-06:00

Wishing I could find a way to write down all the posts I've written in my head in the last month or so. The lack of posting is my life crying out, "Uncle!" in protest to an overly-busy schedule...simply too much to do. I'm never at a loss for words...just time to write them down. May I never be so busy that I stop taking pictures. Here are some that make me smile.

He's just not a hat guy...

2009-12-12T17:01:00.001-06:00

I tried. Owen only likes the kind of hats his daddy wears--baseball
caps. But he sure makes a cute little elf anyway. ;)

My Little Squaw Emma

2009-11-24T22:53:00.005-06:00

Emma has been learning all month about the first Thanksgiving. I get a new little tidbit from her every day. One day she told me about how the Native Americans used a certain animal for so many things...I could kick myself for not writing down exactly what she said. It was something like "humpalo" or another Emma creation equally adorable. I gently said, "Ems, are you sure it wasn't a buffalo?" She thought a moment and said, "Mom, it was a buffalo." She is such a sponge right now, so full of the love of learning. I am so thankful for Mrs. Kugler, all the special area teachers, and all the other dedicated adults at our school who make it such a wonderful place for Emma to learn in spite of the growing pains we are going through this year as Trinity is bursting at its seams. I passed my little squaw and all her friends on their way to lunch yesterday...they were oh-so cute. Emma told me last night that she was sad there wasn't going to be school today. Why??? Because it's ice cream day in the cafeteria, of course, and she'd miss it! Such simple joys still exist. And I'm thankful.

How we all love this boy!

2009-11-23T21:04:00.004-06:00

Emma looked at Owen's shirt and "read" what she knew it said..."Daddy's little rocker." She said to him, "You're Emma's little rocker too, buddy." She truly loves her brother. Sophie does too. She asked to have him after his bath tonight when he was all warm and cuddly in his towel. She scooped him up and whisked him away. I am so thankful that he has brought so much joy to not only Jeff and me, but the girls too.

Bye-bye baby curls (maybe...)

2009-11-14T11:14:00.013-06:00

Yes, Owen had his first haircut today. A couple of weeks ago one of our little jaunts about town trying to get him to fall asleep, I noticed that the darling little brick building I've always loved on the corner across from the historic Thompson's Station Train Depot was now a hair salon called The Hair Depot. In my dreams I've always thought that little building would make a wonderful artist's studio. Big windows to let in lots of light, and definitely a wonderful vibe about it. Today was the first time I stepped inside, because Owen's little curls had become unruly and it was time for that first trim. Things had not grown evenly. You could definitely tell which part had taken off first and which was still, um, growth-challenged. But why here for the historic event? Because of the sign in the window: "Mini-Cooper Styling Chair for Kids". That was calling my wheel-lovin' boy's name, for sure. (Oh, all right...it was calling scrapbooking, picture-taking Mom's name! Sheesh!)

Here's how it went down. We walked in and he knew something was up. The lady who would be cutting his hair approached us and he started to whimper a little...this couldn't be good, he must have thought. We talked about the cut she'd be doing, and headed to the styling area. She discussed whether I would hold him in my lap or in the Mini-Cooper. Once he saw the car, the choice was made--he was intrigued. The pictures tell the rest of the story. Our stylist was wonderful with him, even when the clippers came out. The suckers sealed the deal (um, literally). We hope the Hair Depot will be around for a good long while. We'll definitely be going back!

I have a BOY.

2009-11-05T22:08:00.002-06:00

All is pretty quiet on my blog since I started back to work. I think mobile posting may be the way to go for me right now (which really cracks me up because that means "from my bed" where Ican prop up my feet).

I love this photo. A better quality version exists on my computer but then I would have to get up, ergo, no posting. Have I mentioned how much I love my iPhone??? Owen loves it too. I have learned to let Jeff download all the good apps so the kids are always after his phone. I like things uncluttered. Is there an app for that?

Anyway, this photo. My pretty mixing bowls that I broke down and purchased after 20 years with the same wedding gift mixing bowls...and lo and behold, nestled down amongst them is a little Tonka truck on its side! Guess who loves to yank this drawer open every day when Mom is in the kitchen and scatter the contents everywhere??? He leaves a trademark calling card. I love this car and truck loving, all boy-boy.

So I've been a little busy lately...

2009-10-30T20:41:00.002-05:00

Back to work. I will have to say simply that it's easier to NOT work. I sure do enjoy the company and environment I work in, the job I do--I just knew it would be exhausting getting back in the classroom, and I was right. It won't always be this intense, but I'm basically having my August/September right now. Adjustments on all fronts. Tiring.

Owen is doing GREAT. He adjusted much easier than I did. He loves playing with the other children, and scrambles to get down and play in the morning when Jeff takes him. I fly out of Trinity as fast as I can after school but since I'm an elementary teacher I still get there later than most of the high school teacher-moms, and he has a bit of a hard time when the other babies in his group have gone. The girl who is there in the afternoon with him is SO sweet to distract him and give him extra attention/TLC so he doesn't fret too much in those few minutes until I can get there.

At the end of my first week back, I was exhausted and sitting out in the driveway with Emma and Owen playing. We'd had 50's Day at school and Emma still had her black 'n white polka dots on...I shot this snippet of video on my iPhone and it is just so priceless! It perfectly captures her personality at 5, happy, playful, expressive--I love all the eyebrow movement and nose-scrunching. Just yummy.

"Mommy, I miss Lineker..."

2009-10-06T09:44:00.008-05:00

Those were the words out of my 5 year-old daughter Emma's mouth after a few hours in the air on our way home from China this past summer. We were bringing home our son, her baby brother Owen. Full of joy, and utterly exhausted after our two-weeks of travel. I smiled because this did comment did not surprise me. Prior to our trip, I'd asked Emma what she most looked forward to seeing in China, and she said, "All those Chinese people." I was amazed at how our Emma, who usually needs a warm-up period with people, took so quickly to our wonderful guides. Sherry and Lineker in Beijing, Dimple in Changsha, and then Amy and Lineker again in Guangzhou. I realized something that our daughter was missing in her life...adult Chinese role models. Through our wonderful church, she's become acquainted with families who have adopted internationally and she's got a special friend there who was adopted from the same province as her--another "Jiangxi Jewel". She also has a friend in her kindergarten class now from China...but no adults. Our guides were funny, wise, efficient, articulate--she watched them switch back and forth between English (Sherry joked about her "Chinglish") and Chinese and lead our groups as we all depended on them and laughed at their jokes...our girl is very perceptive and I think she was blessed to see these wonderful people who looked like her in these leadership roles. I know she also enjoyed seeing the ladies in their stylish outfits each day...Emma is a girl who enjoys getting up each day and picking out her clothes...she loves "being a girl". Each one of the guides took time to get to know not just Emma but all of the children in our group.

So, because of this realization, Emma is taking a Chinese class! For one hour each Monday evening, she sits in class with 5 or 6 other girls who, I realized last night, are hard to tell apart from the back when you snap a picture. She doesn't stand out because she looks so different, and that alone has got to be a good thing for her...to sit with other lovely little girls who look like her. And the class is taught by Ms. Salina, a dear woman from Taiwan whom I had the pleasure to meet the year we adopted Emma because her son was in my third grade class. Salina's daughter Frances comes to class and helps. Frances is a senior in high school...stylish, smart, talented, and very good with young children. Emma was very nervous about this class at first, but after she got her feet wet, she is loving it and looks forward to going. She's learned colors, and we are working on counting, some names of family members, basic phrases, animals, and some little songs. A bonus--I put the CD on in the car and when the Chinese came on, Owen lit up like I'd put it on just for him! So we'll see how it goes. It's a long haul for us and I know when I start back to work it will seem longer, but I am glad we are doing it. We have two China blessings. I want to be sure they have a sense of the awesome place they are from.

He's been scrapped now.

2009-10-02T11:44:00.007-05:00

Yes, Owen's officially been scrapbooked by his mom now. We've taken oh-so many pictures of this boy. Jeff, since he got his iPhone a little over a year ago, has become a picture-taking crazy man, whipping that baby out left and right, and now with the new one that has video, my head is spinning and I am primping more than I should be at home. ;0 But to date, I had not scrapbooked a single picture of this boy until yesterday. I always have a hard time getting my mojo back after not doing any scrapbooking for a while. I take comfort in remembering a letter I read from Claude Monet that he had written to someone after he hadn't painted for a lengthy period of time...something like 4 or 5 months. He said something like, "I know I shall have to ruin a few canvases before I paint anything worthwhile." Sheesh! What hope do the rest of us have when we grab that cherished moment of free time and hope to be productive? We can't flush those minutes down the toilet, Claude! It may also have been him who said that there is some point during which every painting he did looked terrible but it is working past that point to find the beauty. Keep working past "crappy", essentially. Hmm. OK. Wish I remembered for sure who said that nugget of wisdom (not the Ann translation) because I think that is so true and I would like to share it with students who are so quick to become discouraged. I am sure I have shared it, in fact, but sources are always good to note. I AM sure the first quote is Monet. So mojo or not, it felt really nice to get back into all my stuff and finally do a page with sweet Owen! Hung it up on the wall in my scrapbook room to inspire me to keep at it. :) The kids are all doing and saying things daily that I want to remember. I will not remember a perfectly clean and organized house, per se, but these things, I will treasure. I already do.

Favorite Quotes

2009-09-27T08:18:00.002-05:00

Yes, they continue to amaze us, these kids of ours. Here are our favorites from the last month or so:

As Sophie was heading out the door to school, I hollered, "Do you want your iPod?"

She replied, "No, I have a book. I only need my iPod if I don't have a book."

Now there's a child after her parents' hearts! Lost without a book at that age, and still, both of us. How wonderful that she's discovered this lifeline of learning and entertainment. She's to the age that Jeff is finding books for her that he's read about...and she and I are reading some of the same series. Very fun at a time when we may sometimes struggle to connect.

Now Emma. They have this little beehive in her classroom. If you behave, your bee stays in the hive, and you color in a green honeypot on your calendar that goes home each night. Bees with behavioral challenges ;0 may have to move out of the hive to yellow, orange, or even red honey pots. After three nights of green honey pots, Emma heaved a sigh of satisfaction while looking at her green honeypots and told me, "Mommy, I know I'm always going to have green honeypots. I'm always going to listen. That's just the way God made me." Such a sweetheart...and with only two days left in September, so far she is right.

On to Owen. Since he got the tubes put in his ears, he has begun to hear so much better, and guess what--speak! Just little things, but more than his former repertoire of "Mama" and "Uh-oh". He now says "apple" (aaa-ooo), and "hot" (aahht), "light" (sounds just like hot but I know the difference!) can imitate the dogs barking, and understands little phrases. For example, when I say, "Do you want to take a nap?" he starts to cry, or if I say, "Are you hungry?" he'll say "Mmm!" SO cute! My favorite Owen quote? We walked by the stove and there was a boiling pot of water on it. He saw it and said, unsolicited, "Aaahht!" By the way, he is also walking! Today is his 18 month birthday. I'll be sure to get a snippet of video to post of him walking.

Now for a photo. I've discovered the best way to get kids interested in a long-forgotten toy or anything is to put it by the front door to be loaded in the van for its journey to GoodWill. Here's a case in point. The little couch was a birthday present for Emma on her 2nd or 3rd birthday but we find ourselves tripping over it more than anything these days...until they all had to squeeze on it. How I love these kids!

And the yummiest thing we found at Whole Foods was...

2009-09-14T11:01:00.002-05:00

Solid Food:Owen::Chocolate:Ann

2009-09-09T12:54:00.004-05:00

Yeah!!! My boy can eat something besides a liquid diet! Here he is, almost frantically consuming the little Gerber-type "puffs", on deck is some macaroni and cheese, and under the chair are Shadow and Abby waiting for morsels to fall from the tray. We saw Dr. Kelly today and he said Owen is healing beautifully, so we don't go back for 6 months. (I just LOVE that little dimple that flashes as he chews. And notice the little "smack"? He could not do that without a palate in place, bless his heart. A new sound we noticed. He's getting used to the wonderful feeling of a mouth repaired the way it should be...so amazing!) After next Thursday, three weeks from our surgery day, Owen is cleared to eat anything. All is just about right in the universe! Now it is time to focus on developing his speech. We are SO thankful for Dr. Kelly and the wonderful professionals at Vanderbilt. And for mac 'n cheese. Enjoy, sweet boy.

My little imitator

2009-09-08T10:14:00.006-05:00

Emma used to imitate us so much we called her "the Emma-tator". Owen seems to be the same way. When it was the 40th anniversary of the moon landing, I passed by the TV holding him as they were showing President Kennedy emphatically saying those famous words, "We choose to go to the moon..." I put the words in italics because if you watch the footage, he is gesturing with his hands very forcefully, almost pleadingly. I looked down at my little 15 month old, and his eyes are glued to the TV, and his little arms are doing the same movements! Then, a month later, we are at Emma's kindergarten check-up with our pediatrician, which happens to be not too long before Owen has his surgery. He's on the albuterol nebulizer treatments and we are holding our breath hoping he'll be well enough for surgery in about 10 days or so. Dr. Meneely runs through the standard checklist of things 5 year-olds should be able to do: hop on one foot, hold your arms out like this, move your hands like this, etc. He looks over at Owen on my lap, and he's watching Emma and doing the same thing with his hands! Dr. Meneely was quite amused. :) He said, "OK, Owen, watch Emma...see how she's breathing? Now breathe like Emma!" But this morning takes the cake for me. We are out front in the cul-de-sac, Owen on his little car, and Shadow's running around with us. It's a beautiful morning and we're taking advantage of the fact that there's not much happening out there, letting Shaddy-boy run free. He's so good about not running off. Mommy's his GPS, so says Jeff anyway, and he doesn't like to get off my radar (although he will follow Abby, who is a free spirit, so poor baby has to stay inside). So out comes our neighbor, gets ready to go in his truck. I start hollering for Shadow, the neighborhood Welcome Wagon, to come back over. I snap my fingers. Then I hear Owen holler for Shadow: "Ahh ooo AHH AHHH!!!" OOOH ahhAHHH!" The best part is, those tiny 17 month-old fingers are trying to snap. Yep, he's looking down at them, little thumb and pointer finger, flicking them together, not sure why he's not achieving the same effect as Mommy, but he's going for it just the same. We gather up Shadow and I can't stop laughing. I love this little guy so much!

A week out of the hospital...

2009-09-08T08:28:00.004-05:00

and Owen is doing better than we had hoped, overall. He resisted napping most of last week which was exhausting for me--can't help but wonder if he was a little traumatized by all that happened in the hospital. He also was not so happy with the lack of solid food once he got home. Seems high chair = solid food. Hey, I get that. Sort of like being on a diet...always eating but never satisfied.

I hunted around in storage until I found this little walker that was Sophie's. We have video and pictures of her "walking" behind it when she couldn't really walk. He has been having a blast ever since we got it out. At first he let it get away from him, but he's really learned to balance and keep himself upright. He'll be walking by himself in no time. Technically he's already walking...takes about 3 steps at a time. Then he gets so excited he plops down. He's been standing alone for a long time so we thought he'd be walking before now, but I'm glad that at least this surgery doesn't seem to be setting him back any. This little clip was taken the first day he was playing with it. Since then he's learned to go the loop downstairs, back up when he gets stuck, swing it around and go the other direction...pretty cute. Our happy little guy. Happier when he can eat some Teddy Grahams. :)

This little guy doesn't know it yet...

2009-08-31T07:15:00.000-05:00

...but he's going home today!!! Yahoooo!!!!

My beautiful son...

2009-08-30T19:51:00.001-05:00

In the recovery room, right after surgery. All I can say when I look at this photo is how thankful I am that we were moved to consider AWAA's special needs program, because I get to be the mother of this precious, priceless, beautiful little angel. I got to scoop him up from that bed, and am watching him as he heals a little more each day. He calls ME "ma- ma". He has his little arm on my leg right now as we are sitting on a blanket on the floor and watching "The Best of Elmo" for the umpteenth time of our stay at Vandy. (Note to self: need more videos!). So thankful for my beautiful son. That is MY boy laying there. Thank you seems so inadequate, God, but thank you. Thank you.

We got wheels today!

2009-08-30T16:05:00.002-05:00

Owen's IV was disconnected so they gave us a red wagon and we were outa there! Fed the fish in the garden and soaked up some sunshine, saw the awesome model train downstairs, and will probably do it all again when Daddy comes. Still, there's no place like home. Maybe tomorrow...

Owen's hospital stay...the "nickel version" so far...

2009-08-30T11:05:00.004-05:00

Our little guy made it through his surgery just fine! We were amazed at how fast it was over! There was no need to do a hypospadias repair, just close the opening a little. Whew! And the palate repair went very well, and has progressed as it should. His IV should come out tonight. The ear tubes went in without incident, as well. Everything went better than we could have hoped, thank God. The first night was rough, as Dr. Kelly told us to expect, but the last 2 nights he has slept well and we may get to go home as early as tomorrow. I am so relieved to have this behind us. I need to close because Owen's trying to help. :) I found out how to post some photos from my phone (like the one below) so they'll show up as separate posts, but worth it. Thank you for all the prayers...we are so blessed.

Just BEFORE we found out his IV had to be redone...

2009-08-30T11:02:00.000-05:00

One Sunday Evening...

2009-08-24T13:08:00.008-05:00

One Sunday evening, I stood in the cul-de-sac, watching Jeff mow the lawn, Owen practice his newly-acquired skills of going in both forward and reverse on his little race car, Sophie flew by on her bike followed by Emma who will soon lose the training wheels, my comments were obliterated by the sounds of at least two mowers and a weed-whacker, an unseasonably cool breeze was blowing, and I realized not for the first time recently just how blessed I am. It pays to look around on a Sunday evening.

So...an update on Owen. We went to see Dr. Meneely this morning, and he said Owen's lungs sounded "perfect"! That's a major turn-around from 6 days ago! So surgery is on for this Thursday and we are very thankful that we can keep this schedule. Lots of prayers, Augmentin, and entertainment from Emma while Owen, Jeff, and I did the nebulizer routine. :) I will do my best to keep the blog updated with his progress.

He Moves Mountains!

2009-08-21T16:05:00.006-05:00

I have been going about my business today with little Georgia Mei on my mind, praying that she will come through her surgery for God's glory...a testament to His greatness and the fulfillment of all Shannon and Doug have gone through to bring this darling little girl home. I just read the latest post on her blog: "Every Prayer Answered!!!" so I wanted to provide that link here so you can see the whole story: http://pandalily.com/miller. Keeping them in my prayers as they have a long road ahead still, but the surgeon said it should be "straight forward" from here. Last night as I held Owen on my lap and we were flipping through iTunes with Jeff and Emma, I felt so heavy-hearted knowing what might lie ahead for Shannon and Doug and how I could walk where they were possibly headed, how they could be so strong, (only God, of course) and wishing I lived closer so our kids could be friends. I just happened to look in my iPhoto pictures (most of our first China trip pictures are not on this computer but disks...) but look what I found in the photos that I have on this computer...moments before they were placed in our arms--the Millers' daughter Ravenna and our Emma. So, sending our love to you guys--you are braver than anyone I know and we are so happy that Georgia will soon be dancing with Parker and Ravenna.

"I am still confident of this; I will see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living." Psalm 27:13.

Time for some healing

2009-08-18T17:34:00.003-05:00

So here's our little guy. We have miraculously gotten three surgeons lined up for his surgery next Thursday, August 27th. Already we are so thankful to our plastic surgeon who is working on our behalf to get it all coordinated...we have heard wonderful things about Dr. Kelly at Vanderbilt, and we feel so blessed that he is taking Owen's case. Our little guy has three procedures, all lined up for that day, the idea being to get it all done with only one anesthesia necessary, and hey, when you're down, you're down, get it over with.

1) Repair cleft palate--Owen's is "pretty wide, but we do it all the time", in Dr. Kelly's words. God bless this man!

2) Circumcision (I'm really sorry, sweet boy) plus possible mild hypospadias repair. Won't know the extent until they "get in there". Dr. Brock will do this; met with him last month...he was very nice and felt it wasn't anything major, but did need to be done now.

3) Tubes inserted in Owen's ears--meeting with Dr. Wooten for the first time this Thursday. Our pediatrician feels this is going to be essential to keep Owen's ears clear; he's been fighting infections off and on since we got home, and we were told to expect this with a cleft palate baby even before accepting his referral.

SO, here's the situation. Owen has had a cold for several weeks...just finished a round of antibiotics...he's developed a very wheezy chest condition (too soon to call it asthma, but could be) and we've been to the doctor 3 times in the last week. Today he's got a new antibiotic, something new for the nebulizer which we purchased last week (Mr. Obama, I like my health insurance and WANT TO KEEP IT), and if he doesn't get well, he won't be able to have his surgery next week. We would appreciate your prayers for our sweet boy...he needs to have this done...the surgeries (with the exception of #3) are not really urgent in terms of having to reschedule, but I have taken off the first 9 weeks of school and this is the time we need to do this. In "the bigger picture" this is just such a small blip on the radar screen of life, and God knows all of these details...it's all under control, just not MY control. I sure do hope we can do this as planned, or work it all out somehow!

Now to something much more urgent. Friends and family, I urge you to go to my Blog List on the sidebar and click on the link to Georgia Mei. This sweet baby girl does not have the luxury of time and a mama with silly little things like wanting to just stick to her schedule. She needs to be covered in prayer for upcoming heart surgery this Friday. On August 14th, Georgia Mei became a US citizen when her mom, Shannon Miller and Georgia's two grandmas landed in America after bringing her home from China (those few words encompass an amazing story). Shannon and her husband Doug's story will amaze and inspire you. The way we know the Millers is through traveling with them in the same America World travel group to China in 2005 to bring home our beautiful daughters from Jingdezhen, Jiangxi Province, China. We literally received our girls back to back, juggling cameras as we tried to capture each others' "gotcha" moments. We have been in touch over the last four years, much more so since we both began pursuing our special needs adoptions early this year. Please lift them up in prayer this week as they are exhausted beyond belief, and have a different kind of exhaustion coming up as Georgia goes through open heart surgery. She's a beautiful little girl brought home to an amazing, loving family, and you will be blessed just looking at her sweet face and reading this inspiring story.

Doink!

2009-08-15T18:49:00.003-05:00

I'm putting this on here because I have to GET RID of it but it is too funny not to record for posterity (supposing posterity might even know what this is, as fast as technology is moving). I click open my Firefox expecting to open to Google, as usual, and my homepage is pbskids.org. You know, "da da da da-DOINK-p-b-s-KIDS!" I just got doinked even though I tried really fast to navigate to my blog before it happened. That's it, just a DOINK! I vowed it was the LAST time. So here it is, my desktop:

One more...

2009-08-15T15:59:00.003-05:00

I love this photo. Emma looking out the window...and yes, that's the top of Shadow's head right beside her. He is the shadow of all of our lives. The constant witness to life inside the walls of the Trubey home. I will bet all the money in my bank (a safe bet given we just went to China, bought a van, and I'm taking off the next 9 weeks to be home with Owen) that he's behind the chair I'm sitting in right now, semi-passed out...but would roll over if I hinted at a tummy rub. Let's see...yep, he's there. I love her sweet profile in this photo, and the shape of his head. They're both looking out the window that looks out to the little bridge and the road going by the side of the house...where Shadow can see the schoolbus bring Sophie home, and then the rest of us following shortly after on a normal school day. Where he keeps us safe by barking at the Weed Man and Garbage Men, and kids who skateboard and hang out by the bridge. He has a purpose in life, not the least of which is hanging out with lovely Emma. :) She just may have a snack, after all.

Laaa-la-la-la-life goes on...

2009-08-15T11:40:00.013-05:00

Got this chair for Sophie's room. She doesn't like it. The queen of comfort finds it's not comfortable enough--something about the neck area not being just right (yeah, yeah, yeah...), so it's in my scrapbook room (aw, shucks!) She DOES like to plop in it and talk to me there in the scrapbook room. Emma likes it too. She is growing up almost painfully fast...so lovely, so mature for just five. Wow.

Our little race car driver. Who cares if he can only go in reverse so far? This is his first time outside, because he's just a little wobbly still on it. He was pushing with his feet...and had the saddest face because Mama was getting farther away with each push. :(

Gentlemen, start your engines!

The melting of my heart...Owen can't use a spoon yet to feed himself, but he hangs on to my hand when I feed him. Sighhh...no rush on the spoon thing so far, not on my part. :) Looks like he may be a lefty; grabs all his finger food with his left hand.

Sophie warming up Owen at the Cherry Grove pool...he loves the water!

Our lovely Sophie, now in 7th grade...so happy to be back in school.

Daddy...my hero. How I love when you walk in the door!

Aww, you love me, you really love me.

Those Tiny Hands

2009-08-09T08:09:00.008-05:00

When all I had to look at were two pictures of Owen, sometimes I would be amazed at his tiny little hands, especially in the picture where he was sitting up. I remember doing this with Emma's referral picture, too. Memorizing every detail. Recently I'd had a rotten day and was just feeling overwhelmed before bed. Couldn't settle down peacefully. So I went and looked at Owen sleeping. He had managed to do what I could not. And those hands...so perfect and beautiful. And still so tiny, compared to the rest of him, even. I've commented that he has his daddy's hands, because Jeff's hands are small...really about the same size as mine. Talented, artistic hands--hands that can type a mile a minute, play multiple instruments sensitively, and are carefully coordinated with his eyes--will Owen's be the same way? And so I started taking pictures. And I found peace and joy.

aaAAAaaaaAAAaaaAAAHHHhh!!! (Translation...Here I Come!)

2009-07-25T21:59:00.008-05:00

Here's our little guy at a birthday party for Emma's sweet friend Elizabeth at the Sweet Dreams Cookie Company today. He really enjoyed all the action! He's been crawling really well for a while now...absolutely darling to watch and hear the pitter-patter of little hands and knees and his little sounds he makes. Listen to the little Tarzan sound he makes as he rounds the corner--we have a little private joke between us...not sure what it is, but when I make that sound back to Owen, he breaks into a big grin.

Hello, Babes in Bend (Kinda...)

2009-07-14T09:05:00.003-05:00

For the last two summers, I've gotten to enjoy the sheer creative bliss of spending a few blessed days out in Bend, Oregon sitting alongside my sista...(well, technically she's Jeff's sister Lisa) but she calls me sis' which is so special to me, because I don't have a sister...anyway, ending the sentence--scrapbooking. Yes, just waking up, grabbing breakfast, and hanging with a bunch of like-minded ladies who've become sweet friends over the past two summers, bound together with a common passion for creatively preserving memories. We head into Bend to a store called Scrap-a-Doodle, owned by Debi, a wonderful lady who trusted us all and let us take over her scrap area and stay as long as our creative juices flowed, keep a running tab of anything we purchased, and just have a blast. These girls have been doing this for over ten years but I just got in on the last 2 years...would have been there this week except Owen needs Mommy more right now, and honestly the thought of living out of a suitcase one more week this summer might put me over the edge. But for this, I'd be scrapping away. Sadly, Scrap-a-Doodle went the way of so many great stores over the last couple of years and closed, but the scrapping continues this week out in Auburn, Washington, so Babes in Pseudo-Bend, I just had to post this, one of my favorite layouts. It's Emma's referral picture...I did it a while ago. Thinking about doing a boyish one for Owen...maybe, "You had me at Ni Hao." :) Have a blast and I'll be eating lots of m & m's here and try to do a little scrapbooking here to at least feel a part of things!

Love,

Ann

Somebody pass me a spoon...

2009-07-10T20:25:00.005-05:00

...because I'm about to gobble this little guy up! I absolutely LOVE HIM! I dressed him up to run some errands and plopped this hat on his head...he kept looking up to try to see it and all he could see was the brim. It's the only hat he will leave on his head for longer than 2 seconds. He has the sweetest little grins that just steal my heart, the gentlest but most insistent cries when he's just really fed up, and most content little sighs when he gets what he wants. He's absolutely put me in the most vulnerable place, I told Jeff the other night. But then Jeff reminded me, that's the only way to really live.

One month later...

2009-07-03T14:42:00.010-05:00

...Owen has learned to crawl on his hands and knees (belly completely up off of the floor), feed himself finger foods and take bites of things like graham crackers and Nilla wafers, be a little more picky about bedtime because he's realized he can protest and be heard, say "Uh oh" when he drops something, imitate little sounds (like Emma doing an opera sort of singing voice...they played it back and forth for a while one night...), give Daddy "five", hang out with Emma in his Exersaucer or play with toys on the floor in the bonus room with Sophie long enough for me to grab a shower, and just generally has woven his way into the general fabric of our daily lives. The girls adore him. Now and then they resent the amount of time he demands of me, I know, and will even say as much...but more often than not they just love him. One night after his bath they were literally arguing about who got to put lotion on him. I told them they each got a leg and an arm. Sophie hollered, "I call the torso!" I settled that by splitting it up front and back. I also think all little girls could benefit by having a little baby brother or family member to see, um, in his natural state. The mystery's over. So that's all it is??? We let Owen have a little naked time and he was enjoying crawling around on our bed. Emma was pretty well flabbergasted. She finally asked, "Did I have one of those when I was a baby?" Definitely good fodder for healthy, open discussions!

Speaking of Emma, she's been such a wonderful caretaker for Owen. Everytime the van stops, there she is to unbuckle him. She loves the little umbrella stroller because it's a nice size for her to push him. I love these photos of her with him...I didn't get great shots of his face because the sun was pretty intense, but I love how she's hovering over him, shielding his eyes, looking at him adoringly, just caring for him. She didn't want me to put him down for a nap today because she wanted to keep playing with him. Such a sweet relationship.

Shadow Bait

2009-06-28T13:11:00.004-05:00

I read a photography tip once for photographing your children with your pets. Put a dab of peanut butter behind your toddler's ear so the dog will lick your toddler, inducing a Kodak-moment giggle. Friends, I ask this simple question: what toddler doesn't already have a dab of something crusty, crunchy, sweet, sticky, or otherwise yummy to any self-respecting golden retriever stuck to himself somewhere, likely in multiple places??? It's to the point that before I put Owen down in the Exersaucer, I have to be sure he smells, um, unappetizing. Wipe him down, face and hands...even lotion and sweat is reason for licking, as far as Shadow is concerned. Poor Owen, here he is in the Exersaucer after we had gone to the Olive Garden...probably has garlic oozing from his pores. He's going to smell like a fragrant, fresh-from-the-oven breadstick for at least the next 24 hours. On that note, he did enjoy his first sampling of the fettucine alfredo, although we mostly stuck to the mashed banana we brought, breadstick, and Gerber puffs. Sorry buddy, it'll be a little while before you get that yummy salad. (Photo credit for this one goes to Emma...she was right there down on his level, snapping away. She loves to take pictures!)

Emma's Missing Something

2009-06-20T19:27:00.006-05:00

Yep, she's lost her first tooth! I was holding a sleeping Owen, Jeff was watching some little golf game on TV (oh that's right, the US Open?), Sophie was on the computer, and Emma was watching the movie "Spirit". She came quietly upstairs to show me a bit of blood on her fingertip, and then pulled back her lip to show that the tooth that has gotten wobblier and wobblier over the last month had now come out and in its place was a bloody hole! This was a moment! And everyone was busy! I asked her where her tooth was, and she said it was on the coffee table. I made as big a deal as I could while not waking Owen, and then I told her to go tell Daddy, who also celebrated with her, but I was thinking that tooth was going to disappear somehow before we could save it. When I finally made it downstairs, the first thing I did was ask Emma where her tooth was, and she said, "Sophie put it in a bag for me." Sure enough, there it was on the counter, in The Baggie, properly written on in Sharpie with the date, and identified as the all-important First Tooth. I don't know if I was more thrilled for Emma reaching that milestone, or proud of Sophie for taking care of her sister in this way. I told Sophie this later, and she just shrugged and said, "That's what you always did for me." Awww. I just love this girl. And now, this moment of Exersaucer-enabled blogging has come to an end. :) Owen needs Mommy.

*** So...next morning, she comes in to show me what the tooth fairy left...and then pulls down her lip and asks, "Mommy, is there any more tooths that is gonna come out soon?"

How I Love This Face

2009-06-18T23:20:00.004-05:00

Just took these today. For my friends at Trinity Elementary, home of the Tigers, notice the bib..."I'm a little Tiger." And in blue and orange! Couldn't resist! Owen has switched over to our time zone, I think, almost. At least no more play dates with Mommy and Daddy from around 2-4 a.m. He saw our pediatrician today for the first time and things look good. He also will see the plastic surgeon on the 29th of June for a first visit about his palate repair surgery. We are so thankful we were able to get in earlier than we'd first thought--hoping to have this done and him well on the road to healing before school starts. I dread it and yet I know it will be wonderful for him to have it done. I am honestly amazed at how wonderful his lip repair looks. I am forever indebted to those sweet nannies who painstakingly fed him with his cleft lip, and then cared for him after his surgery...it breaks my heart to think of him going through that without me and yet I know that they loved him and took good care of him. I follow the line of his upper lip with my eyes as I hold him in my lap and I am just in awe of what can be done for these children, and that it was done for this child, in an orphanage, at only three and a half months old. China did not make money on him. I can't see how they would have broken even when you consider his care, and especially his surgery--I am so grateful to the orphanage of Chenzhou for caring for my sweet, happy son.

Cutting to the chase

2009-06-17T13:59:00.000-05:00

My little shopper is all shopped out. As I've gotten over the jet lag the past few days, we've been to Target a couple of times, and of course Kroger. Owen loves to ride in the cart. We've been to Wal-Mart this morning, something that exhausts me too, so while he's recovering I have a minute to post some pictures from Gotcha Day with our prize find in China...Chen Li Wen...our little guy.

When we flew into Changsha, the capital city of Hunan Province, we were taken to the Grand Sun Hotel before we went to the Adoption Center to meet Owen. This hotel room had a crib in it...AHHHH!!! It really is going to happen!!!

This was one of the two nannies who came down from Chenzhou with Owen. It is a four-hour trip. This was our first glimpse of Owen. He was peacefully sitting there with his nannies in this little outfit that said "Happy Baby" on front...how true! Only when he's hungry does he complain.

Somebody pinch me! The nannies were very kind. They had several things to give us. One was something I'll have to show in another post...a package with the clothes Owen was wearing when he was found. Breaks my heart. What a treasure to have for him. He was loved, I know this. They also gave us a small gift bag with a map of the city of Chenzhou, marked with the location of the orphanage, a business card of the orphanage director--they indicated he would very much like to have updates on how Owen is doing--pictures, etc., and a little stamp ("chop") engraved with Owen's Chinese name, hanging on a red braided cord. Virtually everyone in China has one of these that is their unique stamp used to sign official documents, etc., and it is stamped with red ink. That was one thing I wanted to be sure I got for Owen while we were in China, and here it was given to him from his orphanage...what a treasure to receive! We felt he was very well cared for and loved while he was in Chenzhou, and have heard good things about this orphanage before from a friend whose baby was there and traveled with us when we went to bring home Emma. I'm so thankful for all the blessings along the way to our boy.

No place like it...

2009-06-13T15:19:00.001-05:00

HOME. I am sitting at my computer for the first time since arriving about 36 hours or so ago. Very tired and jet-lagged still, but feeling so blessed. There's a little boy sleeping upstairs (and a big one, too). Two girls playing in the bonus room, one who woke up at 6:00 a.m., one who woke up after noon some time. We are all out of sync, luggage just inside the front door, counter strewn with clutter accessed just as we've needed things because who has time to do any decluttering yet? We are still in post-travel survival mode. But all these things will get done. We made it. There is a list of prayer requests on my sidebar...and just having taken a peek at them, every one of them was answered, plus a whole slew of them that never made the list. *** Thank you, friends and family, for lifting us up. Thank you, God, for answering the tiniest of human requests, like when I was at my limit upon arrival and I just asked, please, I need two things, very soon: 1) to see someone from America World, and 2) to find a bottle of water I can drink. Both happened in less than 5 minutes, after an endless day of travel. Yes, I'm thankful. Yawn...the boys are still asleep, but not for long, I'm sure. Enjoy the pictures...more to come.

Moved my requests here:

***Safety--all the way!

Health--for us and for Owen coming out of the orphanage and being exposed to all the new environments and germs.

A smooth process--there are so many things to accomplish on this trip...appointments, paperwork, flights, etc.--may it all be as glitch-free as possible.

Bonding with Owen--that he will feel the love we have for him and that his little heart will somehow sense that he is safe and secure with us, even though his whole world, scenery, sensory input--everything--has changed dramatically.

Peace--that fear or worry would not gnaw at us (ok, ME) for any reasons. :)

That our girls (especially Emma) would know that adding Owen to the family does not in any way diminish our love for them, and that this trip would be a wonderful learning experience for them. Also that Emma would gain a sense of the incredible country she comes from, and delight in seeing "all those Chinese people" (what she said she was most interested in seeing on our trip! Um, time to step up the cultural education, Ann.)

Thank you!!!

Be still my heart...

2009-06-08T22:25:00.000-05:00

He said "Mama". He has a good teacher, of course, who knows the value of lots of review. :) Yep, and this morning when those big brown eyes were maybe two inches from mine and he said those two syllables, we all heard it unmistakably. Then again several times again throughout the morning. He has been sort of warming up to it the last few days, but he hit a home run straight into Mommy's heart today. Then Sophie laid down on the bed with him and he cuddled up with her, burrowing his head into her chest...such a little loving baby! He fell asleep cuddled next to me just now on the bed..his life is good. Mine is too.

Owen in shorthand

2009-06-07T22:31:00.000-05:00

Still on the iPhone so I will be brief as this is tedious. Owen weighs 19.5 pounds, 29 inches long, is wearing 12 month clothes but 18 are working fine. He does not know how to feed himself...I think his cleft palate required special attention and he just waited until they fed him the softer stuff by spoon. I sat with him on the floor for a good hour yesterday with bits of Ritz cracker and he figured out how to put it in his mouth pretty well. Amazing how quick he could learn this simple thing...seems like he should have been able to do this before. He is eating most everything as long as it is soft. He can sit up, pull up to a stand, sort of scoot/crawl but not really crawl--it won't be long. He wakes up with a smile and even his fussing isn't very fussy. Just very sweet. We go shopping on Shamian Island this afternoon and our US Consulate appointment is tomorrow. We are home in Nashville around 5:30pm on Thursday, June 11. I will kiss the ground when I walk in my front door. I love China but I am a homebody and it is hard making bottles in a hotel room when you can't drink the water or wash clothes, dishes, etc.

Gotta go love on my girls...

Ann

We're Here: Owen is Great!

2009-06-07T04:17:00.000-05:00

We are in China ending our first week as parents of three kids, the newest one being a cute little guy we have all fallen in love with. We are so sorry that we haven't been able to Bly as planned. I am going to have all summer to catch up on photos. China has blocked both of the blog sites I use, and we are doing this now from Jeff's iPhone. We will see if we can get pictures to work next; may send them to a blogger friend in the US who will post for us. The short story is this--we are blessed, God is good as always, and Owen is more precious than we could have imagined. More (much) more when I can really type!

Feeling a bit overwhelmed...

2009-05-26T21:59:00.000-05:00

It WILL all get done, we WILL get on that plane to go get Owen, despite the many things that need to still get done. I must say I feel less stressed than when we went to go get Emma, or "pick me up" as she likes to say. I am taking time to just BREATHE and soak up the fact that I have a baby boy in China, waiting for me. My laundry's done, most of the stuff on my list is accomplished, it is just pulling it all together, and it's not worth a migraine. Inhale, exhale. God, can't do this without you. Lloyd's message from this weekend was amazing. He ended it with a scuba tank on his back, recalling his experience diving with his brother and how he was reminded to breathe. We all need to breathe, not the toxic things (OK, I have had way too much caffeine and too many m & m's today!)...stress, worry...but just resting in the fact that God has the details under control. I even got confirmation that our visa 37 cable was sent to the consulate today! The rest is going to fall into place, too. Breathe, Ann. Get ready to spend time with your family and go love on that little guy.

Don't Stop Believin'

2009-05-24T21:22:00.000-05:00

So we're in Target tonight...checking out the flatware. Emma is her usual happy self, singing in the cart. The store is more empty than usual because it's kind of late. She's singing with a passion, lots of emotion and lilt to her sweet five year-old voice: "Don't stop believ-in', hold on to that feel-in', street light pee-ple....." She's really going for it, absent-mindedly eyeing the spoons I'm thinking about adding to our collection because somehow ours keep walking off. There are probably some, oh, I don't know, up under Sophie's bed...sigh...it's just $5.99 for six, Ann. Just do it. Then I hear some people chuckling over in the dollar aisle. Yes, they are just getting a major kick out of the miniature Steve Perry in the back of my cart. I smile, they smile, remark how she's just too cute. She scrunches down a bit, slightly embarrassed, and by the time we are to the next aisle, she's launched into Taylor Swift. That's my girl. Always a song in her heart. This isn't the first time she's charmed someone by singing her heart out as we are rolling along in a store. A girl after my own heart. I remember not long after we came home from China, holding that baby and just rocking her and singing to her for a good hour sometimes. STILL wouldn't go to sleep in her own bed after that, but I guess the music fed her little heart. She was a singer from the very beginning. LOVE that about her. Wonder if Owen will be a music lover? His Auntie Lisa sent him a darling long-sleeved T-shirt that looks like it has an iPod in the pocket and ear buds hanging around his neck...it says "Music Lover". I flipped. Sweet. We will soon find out! Leaving for China in four more sleeps!!! (that's assuming I sleep!)

Bank account OPEN, Shop Vac ON...

2009-05-23T06:23:00.000-05:00

Jeff called me yesterday and said, "Are you up for going to Lowe's still? Cuz' I haven't spent enough money yet today." Paid for part of our China trip today, have been van shopping, and of COURSE, after 7 years of living in this house, our dishwasher went out this week. So we went and plunked down another chunk of change to get a new one, because we can't bring home a baby and be washing bottles by hand (OK, yes, I know we could, I know how spoiled that sounds, but, BUT,...). So as we were waiting around in the appliance department I told Jeff how proud I was of him for how hard he had worked this last year (major long hours and stress) that we could just go out and replace this broken appliance on top of everything else we are spending right now on the adoption, trying to buy a van, etc., and he said, "God is good. (pause) And we are spending all that goodness..." Sigh...it's only money. Feels kind of like we are living as our pastor Lloyd has suggested, with our hands open, to receive, and to let it flow back out...you know, in a giving sense. Um, Lloyd, didn't know it was gonna go to Lowe's. OK, but most of it IS going into the adoption. To flesh out that visual, his point is that if we live our lives in a posture of fists clenched, clinging tightly to everything we have, we are not open to receiving, and then giving. SO true.

OK, we really ARE coming, Owen!!!

2009-05-18T19:28:00.000-05:00

We got the email today... "Concrete Travel Dates!" Now that's a lovely subject line! May 28 to June 11. The thing we were waiting on was an appointment with the Civil Affairs office in Hunan. Got it! Many Civil Affairs offices are hesitant to make appointments right now, some are denying them, and the China Centre for Adoption Affairs recently encouraged agencies to delay travel when there were several confirmed cases of swine flu. They've been very aggressive about containing it, however, so it appears that it's a go for us! We'll know more about flights and an itinerary possibly tonight still, or tomorrow. It's really happening! If I wake up in the middle of the night, that's it...I can't get back to sleep for all the racing thoughts: how will Owen react when he sees us? Will I know how to feed him with his as yet unrepaired palate? Will we bond easily, or heaven forbid, what will I do if he rejects me and only wants Jeff??? (This happened with one of the baby girls in Emma's group last time...and Emma was none too keen on anyone but me for the first couple days...of course I hardly remember that!) I know it will all be OK...there's just so much to think about, and so much to do! Oh yes, and a school year to finish up! But all the pieces, big and small, are coming together. Like it's all being Divinely orchestrated. Duh. Like, um, since the beginning of time??? Yep. God's just showin' off now. Now if you could just get me through to someone at the National Visa Center so I can be sure that they have our Visa 37 Cable in Guangzhou so that after all of this, Owen is allowed to immigrate to the U.S., that would be just super duper. I've tried twice tonight and they say I need to call back when a supervisor is available. :)

Nothing personal, Wilbur...

2009-05-12T22:12:00.000-05:00

...but I'm REALLY not liking the word "swine" these days. Got a travel update from our adoption agency that we could be delayed due to the latest in the swine flu saga...a case reported in mainland China. Everyone in contact with the person in quarantine, including an adoptive family and their guide, and this in Guangzhou (about an hour's train ride from Hong Kong) and where we need to go for our U.S. Consulate appointment. This is the last appointment needed in order to book our flights, and set up all the other appointments, but the consulate is understandably hesitant to confirm this appointment given the cost of having to cancel these flights, or worse yet, get there and quarantine us all. Sighhhhh. I know that from the beginning of time, God has known the precise moment Owen would be placed in our arms, and that this is not surprising or worrisome to him in the least. Um, it's rocking my boat a little, God. Just need some peace. Thanks. G'night.

TA Finally!!!!

2009-05-08T21:07:00.000-05:00

I hate to say finally...we really haven't waited that long, but it has been an anxious wait due to the H1N1 (swine flu) virus. An extra declaration form for each of our visas was required, stating which countries/states we'd visited recently, and China is being very careful about inviting people over, understandably. Just like I wouldn't want to invite horribly sick folks into my home. But Owen needs to come home! We need to get his palate repair surgery done, start bonding and interacting and getting about the business of being a family! As Emma says, "We need to catch up with him so he'll be doing the right stuff!" Explanation: she was very confused as to why I would comment at bedtime, "Owen is getting up now and having breakfast," and in the morning, "Owen is going to bed now." Finally, I took our globe and a lamp and did the demonstration with her that I do with my third graders...here we are, Owen's over here, the sun is here, when the earth turns, he is asleep because see, it is dark there, but we have sun, blah blah blah. She GOT it! So now, Owen will be doing the right stuff, and "all those other babies will still be doing the wrong stuff." Such a little smarty pants! So, it is "almost definite" that we will leave on May 28th, and return between June 10th and June 12th (our anniversary!) We are coming, Owen!!!

My son...the drummer? Hmm...

2009-04-28T20:48:00.000-05:00

I don't know why...I just have this funny feeling Owen might be a drummer. He's coming home to a music-loving family. About a week or so ago, I said to Jeff, "I think Owen might be a drummer." Not anything I can explain, really. Just a foggy little vision of a handsome guy behind a drum kit. Strangely, in my vision, Taylor Swift's Fearless is playing...probably because it's the song Emma and I listen to most in the car these days. She's a girl after her mama's heart. We have to start from the beginning of the album when we go somewhere, consequently we know the first 4 songs or so really well (about a 20-minute drive gets us most places we need to go). But seriously--look at his picture! I was sitting in church with this shot on my lap as I have been doing for the last 2 months now, and this week it dawned on me...look at his hands! He just needs the drumsticks! And then I saw our friend Rob, and he agreed...and said, "The block looks like the drum!" Gonna be buying my boy a drum. Yep.

Rotten TCAP Memory

2009-04-26T17:17:00.000-05:00

So we just finished TCAP week...Tennessee's achievement test for kids through the eighth grade. Always a relief. I was telling Jeff this afternoon about how quite a few years back, I remember walking down the row past one of those boys who would have taken my scores through the roof. It was the end of the week, we were all tired, the test was done, the enormous booklet finally bubbled in from front to back, for better or worse with an approved, well-sharpened #2 pencil, and he smiles up at me with an obvious feeling of satisfaction and accomplishment and says, "Mrs. Trubey, time has flied." Yep, that's what he said. Time has FLIED. F-L-I-E-D. Son, HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN IN MY CLASS????? I just smiled back. Sigh. Learning is a process. Glad to be a part of it.

"Blessed are the pure in heart..." ('cuz they get CHOCOLATE!)

2009-04-26T17:06:00.000-05:00

Exchange overheard from the back seat on the way to church, after Sophie notices that Emma has come armed with her purse w/money, and her Bible:

Sophie: "What is the money for, Emma?"

Emma: "It's for this girl, Jisha. We bring money to help take care of her." (Our church sponsors several children through Compassion International.)

Sophie: "So what's the Bible for?"

Emma: "The Bible is for chocolate kisses."

Sophie: "That's a little distorted, isn't it?"

Emma's Princess Ponderings

2009-04-24T20:24:00.000-05:00

A couple of weeks ago Emma and I were headed in to Michael's when out of the blue, Emma pipes up, "Mom, do princesses have to go potty sometimes? And do they just have to raise up their dresses to go?" Stifling a laugh, I responded, "Yes, they do...everyone does." She says, "Eww...I don't like to think about princess going poo-poo." OK. Must...text...Lisa...I think to myself, as fast as my fumbling fingers can find my phone. Lisa replies back, "It probably smells like daisies and fairies..." and then I replied, "...and it is probably pink, purple, and sparkly."

Next installment...from the back seat, as she's buckling up yesterday: "Mom, do carriages have seat belts?" Oh, how I love this wonderful, magical place she's in right now. Here she is...last Halloween in all her princess perfection. Lucky, lucky me.

Back off, Shaddy Boy...

2009-04-21T20:15:00.000-05:00

...these oh-so-cute shoes are NOT FOR YOU! Look at that golden snout, sniffing the aroma of those freshly unpackaged suede soles...just longing to chomp down on a delectable hors d'oeurvres of a chew toy and make short work of turning it into...well, never mind. I just registered at Target for a shower for BOY things! This is too exciting! Everything is moving so fast all of a sudden, and after being stuck in a quagmire for the last 2 1/2 years...it's hard to keep up with all we have to do. But when I saw these, and just one pair in size 12-18 months, I had to get them for Owen. I held the soft leather in my hand and tried to imagine them stuffed with a chubby baby foot. Too sweet.

One MORE...

2009-04-20T18:04:00.000-05:00

I guess I'm only allowed to upload 5 images per post? But I couldn't leave this one out...because despite her unconventional choice of a place to practice, Sophie Trubey DID get out her trumpet over spring break! She really enjoys being part of the band. Thanks, Mr. King and Mr. Dickens, for keeping it fun, funny, and interesting. And her HMS band shirt? She cuddled up next to me this morning before heading off to take TCAP's and told me it's the most comfortable shirt she owns. A nice perk. Love this girl.

Easter week...in pictures

2009-04-20T17:25:00.001-05:00

Another Easter Miracle...

2009-04-16T20:13:00.000-05:00

Sophie Elizabeth Trubey was born March 30, 1997, on Easter Sunday, and placed in our arms two days later (yes, April Fool's Day).

On March 27, 2004, I stood with Jeff and Sophie on China's Great Wall, just hours away from holding Emma; this was also Easter Sunday...her "Gotcha Day" would be the next day, March 28th.

On March 27, 2008, a baby boy was born in Chenzhou, Hunan Province, China, and abandoned 4 days later. In America, Jeff and I wondered if the wait for Chinese adoptions would ever speed up. Maybe after the Olympics. And so we waited. And waited. And I had to admit I had this little thought deep down inside, wouldn't it be neat to have a son? And we kept waiting.

A year later, much has changed. We are miraculously waiting on those key pieces of paper to come through so we can bring home that little baby doll looking boy, Chen Li Wen, our Owen. I must confess I sleep with his picture beside my bed most nights, I pull it out of my Bible at church so he can "sit on my lap" at church, and I just look at him for that hour and think how grateful I am, and I wipe away a tear or two because I know how much I love my girls, and how simply wrong it is that he is THERE and not HERE. So during the week of spring break and Easter week, three blessings happen. First, a friend from our travel group to China back in 2005 emails me out of the blue...she ran across my blog, and saw that we have accepted a referral for a son from Chenzhou--this was where her daughter was from! I remember that her sweet Katie was in a wonderful orphanage and she truly was well-cared for...we get back in touch, and I get a true sense of peace that our son is being loved and nurtured, even if he's not home with us yet. Second, our PA arrives, after waiting 30 days. And third, on the evening of Easter, I decide to check out the photos file of the yahoo group I had recently joined for families who have adopted from the Chenzhou orphanage. I notice that there are files labeled "Chenzhou babies, March 2009". My heart skips a beat. I cruise through the photos, and sure enough, THERE HE IS! I can't mistake the face I have stared at for hours. He's just sort of half asleep in a crib, and all I can see is his sweet face, but it is enough. I email the lady who has taken these pictures, and she is gracious enough to send us the full resolution photos so we are able to zoom in and really see how well his lip has healed up, and she even sends a snippet of video. An Easter miracle for Owen. Now I have one for each of my children. I literally smiled up at the ceiling when I found those pictures and said in my heart, "Aw God, you did it again! You really are something!" So here's that sweet boy.

Three beautiful letters...L-O-A!

2009-04-15T19:40:00.000-05:00

They stand for "Letter Of Acceptance"...the official document that China sends to us to say Chen Li Wen is ours...and it came to our agency today!!! I was actually showing my math club the amazing 20-second snippet of video that came miraculously to us by way of a woman who visited the orphanage in Chenzhou where our Owen is, took some pictures/video, and posted them on the website of families who have adopted children from there (more in another post on this!) I had just finished showing them this little movie (who doesn't love to see a movie instead of doing TCAP review???) and the phone on my desk rang. I was shocked when our family coordinator Melissa told me she had received our referral acceptance today (also called LOA). I couldn't believe it! The kids knew something was up. I just held the phone out to the room and told the kids I needed them to cheer. They were happy to cooperate! I totally did not expect this so soon after just getting the PA last week...I was a worthless teacher the rest of the afternoon. Now that we have this official document, we can post this referral photo...meet Chen Li Wen, our son Owen Li Trubey.

Mamas, don't let your puppies grow up to be DOGS...

2009-04-08T07:45:00.000-05:00

...cuz you can't do THIS anymore! When Shadow heard me talking on this video clip, he put his mammoth paws up on the desk and sniffed the screen. He's such a baby at heart still...such a lover boy. But the boy ain't fittin' in the swing any more, not at 70 pounds or so! This was on the first weekend we had him home. Just ran across this today...a "remember when" moment.

Hang on, Owen baby, we're coming!

2009-04-07T07:51:00.000-05:00

We got our PA yesterday! This is the "Pre-Approval", which is China saying "we have received the request by the Trubey family to adopt Chen Li Wen, and after reviewing their plan for his future (a 'Rehabilitation and Nurture Plan', we agree to proceed to move forward into the procedure for the adoption of this specific child." Our agency is wonderful and had no doubts that this would happen, we have long since been through review so if there were any questions about the documents we sent (our dossier), they would have come up at that time, however it is SUCH a good feeling to see this in writing (even if I was staring at Chinese characters! Thank God they provide a translation! :) Now to settle in and wait for the next set of coveted letters--LOA-Letter of Acceptance. Basically this says, we've done all the official stuff, he's yours once you get over here and sign the papers! THEN the last wait is for the TA--Travel Approval. Time to book the flights! Still hoping to travel in June. We're coming, baby boy!

A. I'm a sucker for cute AND easy.

2009-04-04T16:11:00.000-05:00

So, what was the question?

Question #1: Why did Ann change to Blogger from her other server?

Question #2: Why did Ann think about, and then decide against trying to make that cute birthday cake that looked like a purse for Sophie's birthday?

Question #3: What did Jeff think when he first saw Ann?

And the answer is, QUESTION #1!

Yes, I traded substance for style. Really, I don't know how much substance this blog platform has yet, I just know that I was having trouble getting all the cute freebies/background options to work on my other blog, and was getting really aggravated...and heaven knows, I need easy when I'm a mom of three--COUNT THEM, THREE kids, and for sure, when we are in China. There's not going to be a whole lot of substance when we are all trying to adjust to the horrific time difference over there while they haul us around from sight to splendid once- or if you're really super-blessed, maybe twice-in-a-lifetime sights in the first 48 hours or so, trying to get you on to China time so you are adjusted to your baby's schedule just in time for it to be completely disrupted in the most earth-shattering experience of their little lives.

Speaking of that trip, I remember arriving in Beijing and we made the decision to go that first evening with the majority of the travel group to see the world-famous Beijing acrobats. Sophie, who had traveled like a pro up to that point, had a major melt-down in the hotel room. In retrospect, maybe we should have just let her sleep, but by golly, we'd paid a bunch of yuan (about $60) to see the show, and we were gonna go! We made it to the bus, and I remember watching an incredible show through eyes that I could barely keep open. Tiny children juggling umbrellas up in the air on the tips of their toes, etc.--it was amazing. Sophie was sacked out next to me, and Jeff was on her other side, catching flies. Every so often they'd rouse from sleep at something really amazing, utter a groggy "Wow..." and pass out again. That was it. The next day was better, and then the next day we started to feel semi-human...I mean, hey, we were on the Great Wall! And, it was Easter Sunday! Someone actually had the forethought to bring along chocolate eggs to pass out to the children (it wasn't me!) Then we had our little angel baby placed in our arms...not a little 6-8 pound newborn, but a 23 lb. baby who wanted mama to hold her all the time. Didn't want to fall asleep because she was afraid of what might happen...a fear she lived with for several years. A new level of exhaustion set in. Then we came home, just when we'd adjusted to the time zone there. I remember her wide awake after her 2 hour "nap" we called bedtime. We played on the floor in her room and found snacks in the still-packed luggage in the middle of the night...fed them to sweet Summer, our dog. Can't believe we're going to do it all again!!! I'm so excited! But we definitely need easy in the blog department. :)

Testing Blogger...

2009-04-04T14:33:00.000-05:00

Testing...how do I like this platform??? Hmmm...